Fallen
by ThomE.Gemcity-06
Summary: Episode Tag: The Man Who Would Be King. What would happen if Cas had a breakdown as all of the issues of the world kept on piling on his shoulders? Thank's to Promise777 for giving me this Fic idea.


**a/n: Episode Tag: The Man Who Would Be King (spoilers). I want to thank PROMISE777 for the excellent idea on this fic and I hope you enjoy.**

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><p><strong>Fallen<strong>

He couldn't take the way that Dean was looking at him, the betrayel that he say in the emerald green eyes. He wanted to disapear from sight, but it was no use; he couldn't break the break the Holy-fire barrier. No, Castiel corrected himself, he knew that he could probably break it himself if he tried, but he wanted a chance to explain himself. He turned from Dean to Sam, but the younger Winchester wouldn't even look at him.

"Sam, I'm the one the raised you PERDITION," Cas was sure he regretted it the second it left his mouth.

Sam's head shot up at this. "What?"

Dean and Bobby both straightend their postures, not that they weren't stiff already.

"Well, no offence," Sam scoffed. "You did a pretty piss poor job of it."

Cas looked at him, silent.

"Wait," Sam tokk a step forward. "Did you bring me back souless? On purpose?"

"How could you think that?" Cas was borderline demanding. Was their oppinion of him that low?

"Well, I'm thinking alot of things right now, Cas." Sam informed him non to gentley.

Cas opend his mouth, but snapped it shut and instead turned addressed all three of them. "Listen to me," he paused. "Raphael will kill us all, he'll turn the world into a graveyard. I had no choice,"

"No," Dean interrupted him. "You did. You just made the wrong one."

Cas shook his head ever so slightly. "You don't understand," he said firmly. "It's complicated."

"No, actually it's not." Dean corrected him. "And you know that. Why else would you keep this whole thing a secret, huh? Unless you knew that it was wrong," he told the Angel when cas didn't say a word. "When crap like this come's around, we deal with it - Like we always have. What we don't do is go out and make a deal with the Devil!"

Castiel wanted to tell him that he was wrong, that it wasn't really as simple as that. That Dean himself hadn't followed this rule and Dean him didn't share with the other's, that Dean and the other hadn't tried to deal with it until, as the Human saying goes "The shit hit the fan". But Castiel didn't say any of those things, didn't defend himself. Instead he said the complete opposite of what was really going on in his mind.

"It sounds so civil when you say it like that," he looked to the floor, afraid that Dean would see that that wasn't what he thought to be the truth. "Where you were you when I needed to hear it?" he looked Dean in the eye this time, wanting to know the truth.

"I was there," Dean said simply in answer. "Where were you?"

Cas didn't look away as he remembered being in Dean yard, watching him as he raked the leaves in the backyard; almost a year after Sam looked Lucifer and Michael in the cage. He had been about to show himself to Dean, to ask for the Hunter's held in the fight against Raphael, but he stopped himself just in time. How could he ask Dean for more? The man had already done enough favours to him and he looked . . . Content with where he was and what he was doing. Castiel couldn't do that to him, not after Sam was gone and Dean was finally settling in. So instead he turned his back to Dean, ready to leave the man in peace - and there stood Crowley with an offer that would leave Dean Winchester alone, so he took it.

Dean shook his head. "You should have come to us for help, Cas."

"Maybe . . ." Castiel started, but something caused him to trail off.

It was a rushing sound, familuar if you were an Angel and a seasoned Hunter. It was a thunder cloud of Demons or more pacifically, Crowley.

"It's to late now," Cas told them, looking around the room from his circle of Holy fire. "I can't turn back now, I can't!" Castiel told them frantically, looking between the two Winchester's and Bobby.

"It's not too late," dean told him, taking a step forward with his urgency. "Damn it, Cas! We can fix this,"

"Dean! It's not broken," Cas took a step to the edge of the ring, trying to make sure that his message was getting through to Dean.

Dean looked at him in confusion, next he looked out the window as the moon light was suddenly blocked out.

"Run," he told them firmly. "Run. You have to run now." he repeated when no one moved.

"Run!"

Finally they moved, running towards the door. Dean held it open as Bobby and Sam ran through, but paused when it was his turn. He looked at cas over his shoulder, his expression desperate. He didn't sat anything and neither did Castiel; the angel hoping that Dean would understand. A few second later, Dean turned and ran, slamming the door behind him. Not seconds later the house was enveloped in darkness as Demon's surround the house.

Castiel looked around himself frantically, circling in his limited area of space, trying to find where Crowley would come in. At this moment, he was very vulnerable, trapped in the Holy fire as he was. He was about to try and disperse the flames when the door that Dean and the other had escaped from rattled. He tensed, waiting.

Slowly, the creaked open and Crowley stepped inside, his hands in his jacket pockets, his foot steps thumping on the boarded floor broadly. Castiel didn't say a word as Crowley stopped in front of the Holy fire, just watched.

"My-my," Crowley looked at Cas, a slight tilt to his lips. "Playing with fire again?" he snapped, his hand swinging the side; the Holy flame extinguished immediately.

Castiel instantly stalked towards him. "If you touch the Winchester's-" but before he could make it to Crowley, the Demon vanished from sight. Cas stopped in his tracks, swing around to where Crowley now stood behind him.

"Please, I heard you the first time; I promise, nary a hair on the Winchester's artfully tussled heads." he mocked. "Besides, I think they proved my point for me. It's always your friends, isn't it? In the end? We try to change, we try to improve ourselves; it's always our friends that have to claw into our sides and then hold us back." he scoffed. "You know what I see here? The new God, the new Devil - working together-"

"Enough," Cas silence him as he walked right up to him, just inches away. And shut up Crowley did, frozen as Cas leaned in close. "You stop talking and get out of my sight." he growled, his voice rough and low - threatening.

Crowley leaned away ever so slightly. "Wow," he said in a monotone. "Glad I came,"

Castiel didn't say anything, just stared at Crowley with his clear blue irises unblinkingly.

"You owe me, by the way." Crowley told him as he stepped around the stationary Angel.

Halfway to the door, the Demon paused, his lip pursed. He turned back around to face Castiel, who still had his back turned.

"You know the difference between you and me?" Crowley started.

Castiel was this close to smiting the Demon right then and there, but the simple fact that he needed Crowley stopped him. He clenched his hands into fists at his side as the demon continued to talk; using every ounce of strength inside of himself not to jump across the room.

"I know what I am." he stated matter of factly.

Castiel's head titled to the side in a threatening manner.

"What are you, Castiel?" he asked, his voice raspy.

Castiel slowly turned to face him, the speed of his movements an indicator on how tense and on edge he was - it was calm, a deathly calm.

"What exactly are you willing to do?" Crowley didn't say anything more, but stared at Cas; trying to get his point across before he turned and stocked out of the abandoned house.

Castiel squeezed his eyes closed and turned from the spot where Crowley had been moment ago; sick of the sight. He could feel it inside of him; coiling, growing, seeping it's way to the surface. It was inevitable; Angel's were arrogant, all of them. Cas maybe no so much as the other's, being more around Human's as he was. But it was inside of him and it had been just a matter of time before it showed itself full blown. and with that arrogance came the anger, the might wrath that would rain down on the world - Just look at what had happened with Lucifer and Michael, Raphael and Zachariah.

Cas clenched his fist's ever harder, his bitten nails digging into the flesh of his palms, drawing blood - it had been a habit that he had developed when he had lost connection in Heaven, it was a habit that he kept to himself; he had tried to stop, but at times would catch himself with his fingers in his mouth. Cas knew that if he didn't release some of this pent up rage that had begun to accumulate, he might do something more to hurt the ones that he cared for.

He arched his back, his face turned up towards the sky that was beyond the roof and yelled; screaming his lungs out. He didn't know how long he yelled, but it was with enough force that he doubled over. The force and power of it caused his wings to spring forth, the mere presence of them filled the room. The night sky darkened further, the moon and stars blackening. Thunder ripped through the sky as hail rained down to the Earth below. A tornado formed from nothing in the sky, and as it descended to the Earth, the force of its winds tearing the trees in the surrounding area up from the ground. More cyclones formed, immediately descending on the house. The roof tore off, flying off somewhere into the night. The windows shattered and each panel from all of the walls were torn from their supports. All that was left was the foundations in which the house had been built and nothing more.

Cas gasped as his scream finally cut off and all of the natural disasters that had formed melted away, leaving destruction behind. The sky cleared and the full moon and twinkling stars once again shone rightfully so. Cas looked up at the sky, his fists now lax at his side as his whole body slouched; exhausted from what was probably considered a melt down. He felt deeply ashamed and let his eyes slip closed once again, confused with the liquid that was leaking from his eyes. His hand came up, slightly smeared with dried blood and he touched the liquid that was cascading down his cheeks. He opened his eyes and looked at his fingers before he stuck them in his mouth, tasting the saltiness almost immediately - Tear's, he deduced.

He couldn't seem to stop them, so they continued on their journey down his cheeks. He didn't want to be in this place anymore, didn't want to see the destruction he had caused. Though he was glad that this cursed place was destroyed, he didn't want nor need to feel any joy or accomplishment at the fact. This place was bad, for both the soul and body - the soul more so it seemed in Castiel's case. He wanted away from this place, anywhere would be better. He felt his wings extend and flap, blowing debris into the air as they carried him away.

Castiel could feel a very slight tingle like an annoying itch, he knew what it was, but before he could open his eyes to find out where he had appeared there was a rustling behind him.

"How'd you get in here?" Dean demanded from behind him.

Castiel kept his back turned to Dean, but answered, his voice quiet. "The Angel proofing Bobby put up on the house; he got a few things wrong."

"It's probably where we got the Angel proofing, now isn't it?" Castiel could hear the accusation in his voice and felt the sting that came with it. "Why are you here?"

"I want you to understand," Cas started; the tears had finally stopped, but the evidence was still there - maybe he should had left the second he knew where he was, but it was to late for that now; Dean had woken up and saw him. His body, all the way to his was tired - of everything - yet he was tense, afraid of how Dean would react.

"Oh, believe me, I get it," Dean interrupted. "Blah-blah, Raphael, right?" he mocked.

Castiel could stop himself, he may have let loose some of the anger that has been inside of him, but that didn't mean all of it was gone. And the way Dean stood there, mocking him? Cas spun around to face him, his eyes ablaze, but his face was still in the shadows. "I'm doing this for YOU, Dean!"

Dean had taken a step back in surprise, and for a second - just a second, Cas felt joy at seeing the fear that flashed through Dean's eyes before the Hunter straightened and stared him in the eye.

"I'm doing this because of you," Cas finished, his voice just a whisper.

"Yeah, because of me," Dean scoffed, turning his back to Cas a he pinched the bridge of his nose.

Castiel shifted.

He kept his back to Cas. "You gotta be kidding me."

Castiel continued. "You're the one that taught me that freedom and freewill-"

Dean turned. "You're a friggin' child, you know that?" he whispered harshly, but then froze as he saw Castiel's face, the moon light causing the drying tear tracks to be more prominent, his eyes puffy.

Cas didn't seem to notice, feeling the sting of that far more than when Dean had accused him of giving them falty protection wards. He didn't quite understand why it hurt that one word hurt him the most, maybe it was that Dean didn't believe him worthy or that he didn't know what he was doing. But Castiel did, he knew exactly what he was doing - he was doing it for Dean. It had been his montra ever since he made the decision.

Dean saw the evidence that Cas had been crying, actually crying; Dean never even thought that it could be possible. Yet here he was; his eyes red and puffy, his nose slightly red and drying tears on his cheeks. But Dean couldn't soften because of this, Castiel was going down a dark path and Dean couldn't sugar coat this.

"Don't do this, Cas." Dean told him. "I'm asking you not to do this, just cause - that's it."

"I don't understand," Cas told him.

"Next to Sam, you and Bobby are the closest thing to family that I've got." Dean wore his heart on his sleeve. "You are like a brother to me, so if I'm asking you not to do something;" Dean paused and took a breath through his nose. "You gotta trust me, man."

"Brother?" Cas asked him quietly.

Dean gave him a look. "That's what I said, didn't I?"

Castiel turned his back to Dean for a moment, trying to - trying to what? Cas didn't quite know, what he was feeling. He had always felt the need to be Dean's protector; though at first it was just a job but now it was something different. Cas turned back to Dean, his mouth open when Dean shook his head.

"Listen to me," Dean told him. "For once in your life-"

Castiel slowly liked his chapped lips; he never really saw any reason to do so, until now just realizing that it was a nervous tick - just like biting his nails. "It's already in motion,"

"What is?"

"It," Cas said very calmly in an aw like manner.

"Cas," Dean said, slightly nervous. "What's with the crazy eyes?"

Castiel looked at him, his eyes bright with not craziness, but possibly glee instead. And he smiled at Dean; Dean had never seen Cas smile before.

"I can fix it," Cas told him.

"Fix what?" Dean demanded.

"Without the Devil," Cas continued. "I can fix it."

"Cas," Dean sighed, frustrated now.

"You were right," Cas agreed, finally seeing it. "I never needed him."

"Cas-" but Cas interrupted him.

"Thank you, Dean." and Cas was gone, vanished

"Fuck!" Dean cursed, hating it when that happened.

But at the same time, he was able to relax. Cas had listened to him and that was all he ever wanted - well, he could go with a slice of pie and sleep too...


End file.
